Today is just one of those days.  I wish I were someone or something else or had a different purpose. Don't get me wrong, I love my life. Truly, I do! It's just a day when nothing seems to work out according to any plan or ideal. This child of mine who I love with all my heart is driving me totally out of my mind. What do I do with a child who refuses to mind?! Nothing at all works. Nothing. He is determined to do whatever he wants regardless of the consequences. I envy those moms who have children who don't seem to question or challenge on a regular basis. There is a reason God made me a parent of only one child--any  more would make me totally insane and I feel like I'm nearly there now. Oh well, school starts in a few days. Even though we are homeschooling, the structure and daily routine will help. I hope. Sometimes I wonder if it's all my fault that he's the way he is. God gave him to me and to my husband to parent, but I am so totally messing it up. I love this little boy more than life itself and would give my very last breath for him. However much he drives me crazy, he's still the best thing that ever happened to me aside from my husband. I pray that God would give me strength and wisdom to pull this thread in the right direction and make the pattern fall back into place. 

Sigh...I guess that's why the threads of our lives seem to make a crazy patch until we see the final beautiful creation woven by God.